Deathbed Wishes

Hello blog readers. I am happy to say that there are now over 500 of you subscribed to this blog’s feed. Thank you. You’ve been a bright spot in an otherwise challenging time. Between the diet, working on the pitch, and life in general, things haven’t been too fun.

It reminds me of this time I met a Hollywood producer just after college. Because I was recently married, we talked a bit about our spouses (he was on his third). He threw his arm around me and told me I could have a great career or a great family, but not both. And that I had to make peace with that.

Back then, I thought he was full of shit. Now? I think about what he said and it makes my stomach hurt.

It seems like a choice between family and career is obvious, and it is. But just because it’s obvious doesn’t mean it’s easy. It’s like Archie choosing between Betty and Veronica.

The obvious choice is Betty. She’s sweeter and less crazy, but if he ever chose her, you know he’d miss Veronica’s drive and passion (not to mention her money). Either way he’d always have misery mixed in with his happiness. And that sucks.

They say that no one on their deathbed wishes for one more day of work over family. But what if that person was only a day away from creating a masterpiece that would last forever? I mean, how many of you can name something Shakespeare wrote? Now tell me the name of one of his kids.

Yeah, it’s a dick thing to say, but you gotta admit, the point’s still valid.

Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!

There are so many things I want to write. At any given moment, I have 4-5 stories bubbling up in my brain. And if that isn't challenging enough, each story is in a different format.

I have a comic book that is currently occupying my time. I've outlined a seven-issue miniseries, and I've completely written the first issue. I am now in the rough draft stages of the second issue. I want to get three issues done before I even consider looking for an artist.

I have the beginnings of a novel. I've written a couple of pages, have several ideas for the next few chapters, and a notion of the ending. Granted, I think a writer should generally know where a story is going to end before they start, but I like the experimental feel this gives me. I like seeing where the character is going to take me, and a novel is the best format for that.

I have a solid draft of a children's picture book completed. I thought it was "ready for print" when I finished this, but after reading it to a few kids...it's not. The story I'm trying to tell is great, but I need to de-clutter the book for kids (especially the age group I think I'm writing for).

I have a couple of film scripts floating around in my head. As a matter of fact, I came up with a brand new one this weekend! I also have a few existing scripts that I could (and should) clean up too. Who knows when I'll get to these though...

Aaargh! Lately, I've been watching the TV show "Limitless" (which is awesome, by the way). It's about a guy who takes a pill that essentially "unlocks" his brain. I would LOVE for a pill like that to exist. I want my brain unshackled (but no, I won't take peyote to do it).

I feel like I'm the little train that could, but I'm on the steepest incline ever.

I long for the top of the mountain.

God, I hope there's a beautiful valley below.

Onward and upward!

Please explain this to me?

So it's been a few weeks since my last post. Truthfully, I didn't even remember what I had posted. I logged into the blog today to talk about being "stuck" with my writing, and I notice that's what I posted last.

I've had this issue for a month?

Actually, I have had some ideas where to focus my writing, I'm just having a hard time going down those paths. It's like I walk ten yards down the path to the forest and I encounter a boulder.

I know, I know, I should walk around the boulder (or should I climb over it?). Unfortunately, my tendency is to take a sledgehammer and start chipping away to get through it.

Why the hell do I do that?

I have never been this badly "blocked" ever.

Writers write.

What the hell am I doing?

This may sound cocky, but I KNOW I have the God-given abilities to do this, so why aren't I?

Maybe if I stop focusing on the boulder, I'll see the way around.

Please, Lord?

Another day, another tap in the nuts

And I really, really wanted to make this a daily occurrence (at least on work days). Well, that's why I haven't told anyone about this yet, I guess.

How about a movie review?

Recently, I saw the film "Into the Woods." It was out about a year ago, so I'm behind the times, but I thought quite a bit about it after watching it due to it's storytelling.

For those who don't know about it, "Into the Woods" was a popular play that mixes together different fairy tale characters. The central characters are a baker and wife who need to complete certain tasks for a witch who has cursed them so they can't have kids. These tasks then lead them to run into Red Riding Hood, Jack (of beanstalk fame), Cinderella, and Rapunzel.

The acting is great, the songs are fairly catchy, and the movie is fun...for the first three-fourths of it's running time.

You see, this play was not intended for kids. It has adultery, violent revenge fantasies, and death in it. This is a problem when turning it into a film - especially if you're Disney (who got the rights).

Think about it - you're a kid-friendly brand and you're telling people that you will be making a film with fairy tale characters and singing. How is this NOT meant to be for kids?

Disney did get Rob Marshall (who made the awesome "Chicago" film) to direct it, which was a good start. But Disney needed to decide if they wanted to go "full adult" with this, or change the play so it's more kid-appropriate. Instead, they try doing both, and ended up with "meh."

Actually, when I was watching the film with my 11 year old daughter, there was a point where I thought Disney could have ended the movie and been all right.

To explain (MINOR SPOILERS ALERT), the story doesn't have a solid three act structure. It actually seems more like four acts. The cursed couple eventually get the curse lifted and have a child, Jack saves his farm with money from the beanstalk, Rapunzel is rescued, Red Riding Hood is saved from the wolf, and Cinderella gets married.

They could have stopped the movie there, amped up a little of the "funny" in the film, and Disney probably would have been fine. Instead, there is a whole additional act where things just get crappy for everyone, and the film ends on a kind of downer note.

My daughter was pissed, and it made me feel frustrated.

As a play, I can see this working. But as a film - especially one semi-marketed to kids - it doesn't work.

There are plays that are only meant for stage, books that are only meant to be read, and films that shouldn't be translated for either. Each media is unique, and needs to embrace what makes it special.

My Pitchfest Proclamation!

Faithful blog readers (all 4 of you), instead of a post whining about my shitty job or bland suburban life, I’m shaking things up--I’ve submitted my entry for Pitchfest.

“What the hell is that?” you ask. Well, for struggling writers such as myself, it’s a lottery ticket of sorts. If chosen, you get to pitch your story idea to three established writers in the literary world. They then choose a winner who gets published.

I’ve entered before, but haven’t been selected. This year though, Pitchfest is coming here to Seattle, so I’m hoping I get special consideration for being from the area.

You know what they say…sixteenth time’s the charm!

It's that time already?

Where does the time go?

I've been trying to get back to writing and back to some kind of "normalness" in my life. I think there's a new normal, and I'm still trying to get comfortable with it.

Before I go much further, I should welcome my one reader - my son. I found out he's reading this. (He may be my only fan.)

Son, I just want you to know that I'll be posting my thoughts here from time to time, but don't get scared. I'm not one of those who posts their thoughts on Facebook, because I don't need to share the garbage in my mind with the world like some folks.

Why do I put it on the internet at all? Well, it's here for those who are interested. Those who want to make the extra effort of clicking a link to see what I think. This is also a place where I'm not going to spit out "bite-size" bits of pablum - although I may on occasion (SIDE NOTE: You may need to look up the word pablum). I'm just going to ruminate.

There are going to be times where I'm mad - maybe even super-pissed.

There will be times when I'm sad.

Hopefully, there are times when I'm happy and think funny things.

Who knows?

Bottom line though - my love for you, your sister, and mom is too big to be contained in the internet. I will do or say dumb things on occasion, but I will never do anything that would intentionally hurt any of you. If I ever express regret about anything in my life, just know that I'm exactly where I want and need to be in life and I wouldn't change anything (even if it sounds like I'd consider it).

Why am I saying all this? My head can be a pretty messy place - it's like an amusement park. There are lame rides for kiddies, fun rides that make you laugh, and scary rides that make you shit your pants. It's loud and full of people - some I'm happy to see, while others are just dumping litter all around.

I don't know if that's the normal way a brain works, or just the way mine works. Maybe yours works this way too (but for your sake, I hope not).

I just don't want you to worry about me from anything you read here. These are just thoughts, and they hold no power...unless you print them on hat and run for president. Then, run like hell!

Anyhow, I'm glad you're here for the ride. You are such a big part of me that it's hard to comprehend - until you have kids of your own. ;)

I love you. 

Blogs away!

A minute ago...

I wanted to choke a cat.

Geez, that sounds extreme.

Nah, I was just super-tense. Now, after a huge tonic and grapefruit vodka? I'm ready to hug the world.

Booze. How did I ever get by without it?

I feel creative, happy, and relaxed. All is at peace.

It makes me think I should keep a bottle at work. Man, that place would be sooo much better.

I have no answers.

But I don't need them.

I have...booze.

--This Irish poem is brought to you by alcohol providers everywhere.